Monday, April 25, 2011

ET iphone

I am terrible with technology.  Maybe you guys have already noticed this judging by how beautiful this blog is (I AM going to spruce it up, just you wait).  Maybe you also noticed this because I TOLD you how hard it was for me to get on the blog train in the first place. I am resistant to change and to admitting that I am getting old. Also, if something doesn't come easily to me right away, I decide I hate it and refuse to involve myself with it (like math, hand-eye coordination, and talking to boys). I had this phone up until three months ago:

It also took me like twelve minutes to figure out how to paste that photo using my new imac, because I do not know how you right-click with this mousepad and have to wait for it to happen ACCIDENTALLY. This new imac is also already breaking down on me.  At least once a day, the screen goes gray and my computer tells me there is a problem and I need to shut it down. Ironically, I blame itunes, also owned by apple, because that's where I download all of my "foreign" shit from (downloading Country Strong counts as foreign, right? Also, I could write an entire post about that movie it is so awesome/terrible/sexy/hilarious).

Anyway, back to my phone.  So three months ago, I decide I need a phone I can actually check my email on and also not have people scream "Zach Morris!" at me when I talk on it while walking down the street.  I heard Blackberries were better for work (something about the keyboard and I must confess I had an office-issued Blackberry when I worked at a production company that I found pretty easy to use), but I kind of wanted an iphone. I wanted an iphone for the following reasons:

1) Everyone who I see who is wearing a good outfit has an iphone. It's just a hot/functional accessory like a beanie hat or a good flannel (okay, so I enjoy gentlemen that favor the lumberjack look).

2) Apps. I don't know what these are really, but I know if you have them you can do things like see where the best places to GTL are (um, you need to watch Jersey Shore if you don't know what that stands for) or have Alec Baldwin's voice say clever things to you or something. Allegedly, iphones have the best apps. So I wanted some.

3) I am trying really hard to become a mac-person. Again, I don't really know WHY, it just seems like mac people are more modern and progressive and cool so you know, I wanted to get in on that action...besides buying an expensive imac that constantly breaks down on me.

Finally a few months ago, I go to the AT&T store and march up to the sales lady and hand her my Nokia. She laughs. Into my face. Which is fine, I get where she's coming from. Anyway, I say I think I want an iphone. She gently tells me it's kind of a big leap to go from my 1999 clunker to the 3G. I gently tell HER I want my apps, bitch. She tells me I should try to send myself a text from the iphone and one from the stupid, nerdy Blackberry Curve (SPOILER ALERT DISCLAIMER: I have a Curve now and know other, very cool people who also use a Curve and I like it a lot, so CALM DOWN Blackberry worker that I don't know about that reads my blog!).  I texted myself "Please work" from the iphone which came out like "Plowsdork" on Zach Morris and when I texted myself "Ugh, fine" from the Blackberry it worked perfectly, of course.

So I let the smug lady sell me the damn Blackberry. And like I said in my spoiler, I do enjoy the Curve and am able to use it...although people are constantly showing me how do things like search for emails, cut and paste, and you know, turn off the phone at the movies.  I also get really jealous when my friend Kalen whips out his iphone (I don't think it's a 3G; I think it's original sauce) and takes a "Hipstomatic" photo with the Hipstomatic app. I always make fun of him and how long the photo takes to pop up on the screen and then sigh secretly to myself because I can't take dreamily-lit photos with my telephone. Anyhow, the point of this post is that people in Silverlake are really tech-savvy and I am not but I am TRYING. So if you see me walking down the street with my Blackberry Curve, GIVE ME A BREAK, because it is a huge, huge step for me.

1 comment:

  1. Wait, Noelia gets "intriguing tights" and I basically get the equivalent of "photographic autotuner?" (I stole that joke from someone, but I don't know who.)

    I'll take it. This blog you've created is the funniest.