Dear iPhone-
Where are you? My dad's secretary sent you to me days ago because I am in my late 20's, yet still on my family plan. I have been wanting you for weeks. Do you think we are star-crossed? Do the Gods want to keep me just a few steps away from COOL for the rest of my life? I have wanted to be with you for so long and it feels like fate is keeping us apart.
Did some technology-thief intercept you? Did you return to sender? I promise to be good to you! I will only take hipstamatic photos on you! I will get every app even though it will make me accidentally call my high school crush in the middle of the night! I will never drop you, even when Emily teaches me how to download that "shake puppy" app and I shake the shit out of you whilst chuckling uncontrollably at photos of adorable young dogs!
Can you just get here already? Please?
Love you already,
Stranger in Silverlake
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